What’s up with us.
I can’t believe tomorrow is September. I remember back in May when I kept thinking it was still March.
AJ recently took the tbas; couldn’t tell you what it means, I thought he was taking up fishing when he said he was taking the “tee-bass.” More importantly though, he did exceptionally well on it, better than we both had hoped for. Now with that combined with another test and his flight hours he has a competitive chance for when he graduates and applies for a slot as a pilot. In other words, Test 1 + Test 2 + Flight Hours = Awesomeness.
He started studying math so he can improve part of his score and asked me to help out since I consider math better than christmas, or the candy store, or a new sweater, or yep, nerd alert. Of course Mr. Smarty pants is smarter than he thinks so half the time I just sit nearby and put rainbows on my eyes and take pictures of him.
He’s got a year left of school but it feels like his graduation is only a short ways away. This time has come so quickly and the end of the school year will be here before I realize. I used to sit and think about what the future would bring for us and now I worry what will happen when its actually here. Our life has started, it started the day we got married but in my mind we’ve been sitting around waiting for him to graduate. Once that happens, we might move out of state, move out of the country, or actually not do anything at all. The complexity and “unknown” of it all really has a way of preoccupying my mind.
Because of that, my thoughts on life have really been wandering recently, quite far from the path I might add. I realized that I’ve been so caught in the world and I remembered a saying the other day, “be in the world, not of the world” and I came to the conclusion that I don’t want to do things because someone else is. I don’t want to expect certain things in my life.because the things that are the most important are a whole lot different than the world’s standards. The simplicity of making that realization and actually believing it has really opened my eyes. It’s hard not to get caught up in the riff raff and I hope I can remember what really matters, keep my eyes focused on that, and live without any expectation.
AJ: “And we’re almost thirty. Double it we’re sixty. Double it again we’re 120.”